The New Adventures of Captain N

Flansburgh Photonics Building, floor 3

Kevin Keene ’s head hurt.

Kevin Keene’s head hurt and he was laying down.

Kevin Keene’s head hurt, he was laying down, no wait, strapped down. or something. He couldn’t move very much. The fog had yet to clear from his head. What had happened? He last remembered going to answer the door to his office to help one last student…

He heard a female voice. He tried to lift his head up to see who was speaking, but his head was strapped down. The drop ceiling gave no details as to his location. It just stared back.

“Looks like he is awake, Doctor.”

A familiar voice could be heard further off, it sounded like it was coming from a speaker of some kind. No, a cell phone, set to speaker mode.

“Good. Just in time.”

Kevin struggled to loosen his bonds. “Who are you people? What do you want?”

“Just calm down Professor Keene.” A male voice, not the one on the cell phone. Younger, still somewhat familiar. “Just relax and this will all be over before you know it.” It was a student, maybe? But who was that other voice?

Kevin sputtered, still struggling, “I will not calm down! Where am I?”

The cell phone spoke up. “Kevin, you really should do as you are advised. We don’t want you hurting yourself. You are in the Flansburgh Photonics Building, on campus, but away from prying eyes. You’re going to help us with a little experiment.”

“I refuse,” Kevin strained. His bonds were tight and secure. “Whatever it is you want, I will not help you.”

“Now now, Kevin. I always thought very highly of you. You were my star pupil. You even gave me the golden egg that got this whole enterprise started.” The cell said pridefully.

Kevin stopped and his heart ran cold in realization. “Dr. Kael? Former head of the Com Sci Department, my old professor?” He spoke slowly, whatever he was drugged with had addled his mind, but it was coming back to him now.

“He goes by The Programmer now,” chided the other male voice. “Show him some respect.”

“It all makes sense now. My old programs being manipulated, twisted. You altered the program I was working on to get into Videoland…”

Dr Kael’s voice responded proudly, “Kevin, don’t be so modest. The program you had was so close to complete, and it is even more so now. All it needs is just a few components from the other side, and we should be able to open a permanent bridge between Video Land and reality. Imagine the implications!”

Kevin was quiet for a moment. he said softly “You’re insane…”

Kevin’s world bloomed into bright colors and sharp pain as he was rapped across the temple by a strong hand. The young man’s. “You better watch your mouth, professor. We need information from you so we can finish this little project. You’re going to help us.”

“I will not.”

Kevin braced himself for another hit that did not come. Dr Kael’s voice said, almost pleadingly, but mostly threatening, “Kevin, you really need to cooperate here. I really need these kids to join me on the other side so we can finish the program, but they were kicked out by your son. For safety reasons, they have to stay out for three days, but with you here, I think we can finally bypass that safeguard. You are going to reveal the secrets of travel to Videoland to us. You will help us recover the Ultimate Warp Zone from the Palace of Power, and you will stop your son from interfering any further in our plans.”

“Charlie… I will not help you fight my son! I will not help at all! Let me go now or so help me, I will have this place torn apart looking for you!”

The young man looked into Kevin’s field of vision now. Gary Grant, all-star athlete. His student did not look happy.

“Professor Keene, we really didnt want to have to do this, but you are going to help us, whether you want to or not.”

Gary filled a syringe, tapped it, evacuated the tiny drop of air remaining. A young woman with purple hair he had seen around campus before walked in from the other side with an alcohol swab. She swapped the crook of his elbow and Gary injected him with the liquid from the syringe.

“What the hell was that?”

“Sodium pentathol, truth serum,” Gary said. “Once it takes effect, you will tell us everything you know.”

Dr Kael sounded from the other end of the cell. "After that, my prized pupil, you will join us in Video Land and I will show you what Video Land and your beloved Princess Lana have taught me. "

“Lana…” Kevin struggled mentally against the truth cocktail running through his system but it was only a matter if time now. He grew quiet now, his mind fogged at the edges.

The Programmer delegated to his subordinates, “Once he reveals what he used to travel to Video Land in the first place, recover it, and meet me at the palace. If I’m right, it should be safe to pass through. Bring your professor with you. I will need to see how the tether subprogram works on human beings.”

“If it doesn’t?” asked The Freak. She didn’t sound very enthusiastic. The Jock shot her a cold look.

“Then we will use him to keep The Captain under control, as our hostage.” The Programmer conceded. “Either way, he’s more useful to us on this side than out there.”

“Understood.” said Gary. “We will move out as soon as possible”

“Good. See you on the other side.” The Programmer hung up on his end.

“What the hell was that all about?” Gary demanded.

“Nothing,” The Freak said quickly. “Let’s get this over with.”

They both turned to Professor Keene and without much difficulty at all, began to reveal through Kevin’s medically induced state, the story of Captain N, the Game Master, and all of his secrets.

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Diary Entry 2
It wasn't meant ter be.

Well…Here we are diary. I thought I may never write again but…I think I need ter get this all down. Lots has happened since I last wrote…I really don’t feel like relivin’ it. Just know bad things went down and we all ended up practically destroyin’ a world o’ funny blocks. It’s quiet in Samus’ ship now. Chrono is off in his corner, brooding….red is bein’ surprisingly quiet and the Captain seems ter be restin’ up. Samus is fly’in her ship to the place o’ power and….I don’t know whut’s waitin’ fer us there. All I know is it ain’t good…. It’s never good.

I don’t know whuts wrong with me. Life was so…simple before… I knew whut I wanted in life and everthang was so clear ter me. Now I… don’t know. I just don’t know anymore. I felt like…my heart had been played with like a cat with a ball o’ yarn. All my personal feelin’s…seem so wrong now. I haven’t felt so lost since Mama died. I feel like that sixteen year old boy again…so angry wit nothin’ to lash at but himself. No family waitin’ fer me…only a heirloom farm that may never feel like it’s truly mine.

It was the way she smiled that had me smitten… When first met her she seemed so shy…so reserved. Nothin’ like Nami or Muffy. A farmin’ girl who seemed ter understand me…I thought I might’a been in love. But she doesn’t love me…I can see that all clear-like now. Those feelings I’d felt from her were nothin’ but fabrications. Lies. And now I feel nothin. I used ter think I was fightin’ so I could go home…get back ter her before it was too late…go back before she married Marvin or some other feller that Vesta tries marrin’ her off ter. When I thought o’ her…I knew what I wanted…suddenly the life forced on me wasn’t lookin’ so bad. I foolishly thought that I had found mai place. Everythang fer once made so much sense…I knew that wherever she was…I wanted to be too. I wanted ter wake up beside her every day and live ma life with her beside me.

But now….

I tore up the blue feather the Captain gave meh. It didn’t seem right ter keep it anymore. I keep a strong face from now on for mai comrades. I need ter be strong fer them… After this is over…the fight…the battle…everythang…I’m not too sure on whut I’ll do. I’m not sure I wanna go home, no more. Maybe if I’m still breathin’ I’ll live at the place and work as a gardener’ or somthin’. I’ll wanna go back ter fetch my animals…at least I know I still love ‘dem… Then…I dunno…All I do know is I am willin’ to die fer the Captain and these folks I’ve come ter know as mai best friends.

All I ever wanted was to have a happeh family. I wanted to be a daddy someday and have a lovin’ wife and a few kids that I could raise and love the way a papa should. Ter give mai kids the life I never had…to make mai Mama proud o’ me. That’s all I ever wanted.

But it wasn’t meant ter be.

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Kevin Keene's personal audio blog 1

Personal Audio Blog of Kevin Keene (excerpt)
 
I’m worried about Charlie.
 
He’s my son, and I know he must be having quite the adventure in Video Land.  How he ended up there was a mystery to me until earlier today.
 
Between classes I have been looking at that strange program I had found on the University Mainframe that I had Charlie and his classmates review and decode.  Had I taken more time, I would have found out exactly why this triggered something in him.
 
When I first came to Northbridge U as a student, I tried to find a way to combine a computer program with what I had learned about how Video Land works.  I was never successful though.  I wanted to find a way to bring our two universes together, maybe establish a stable Warp Zone so I could see my friends again.  While I remained able to travel back and forth using my old NES, my program never worked for anyone else, though no one I tested it on at the time had any idea of what I was testing.
 
That program I created is buried deep inside this larger program I gave to Charlie.  It must have triggered something in him and sent him over to Video Land.  But only a portion of the program was designed by me.  Someone has been working very hard on expanding it since then, and it looks like it might be able to work on more than just Charlie now…
 
Strange…
 
Looking at the modified date for the program and the IP address of the last user, it was last accessed by someone in the Flansburgh Photonics Building just yesterday.  So is the program not yet complete?  It wasn’t well hidden, so I think someone wanted me to find it.  Why would someone want me to fi—
 
Does someone else in the Real World know that I was Captain N the Game Master?  Not even Mother knows the truth.  The only person I’ve ever spoken to about it was Charlie and only very recently…
 
He wasn’t kidding when he said he was in trouble.  I can’t wait until Sunday.  He’s in trouble now, and even though I havent been to Video Land in a very long time, he needs all of the help he can get.  I will leave at once.
 
Let me cancel all of my classes for tomorrow…  Done.
 
(Kevin’s chari moves and the sound of him putting on his jacket can be heard.  Suddenly, there is a sound of knocking at his office door.)
 
Of course, I still have office hours, even at this late hour.  After I take care of this student, then I will go.  There isn’t a moment to waste.
 
(Another knock, more urgent this time.)
 
I’m coming, hold on.  Pause recording.

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High Time in Hyrule!

PokeDex Log Entry 7
Trainer: Red

I never thought after so much time in Mega-Land that I’d miss the smell of grass and the open countryside! It’s like the smell of new beginnings and hope and ummm grass! So we popped out in what the captain tells us is Hyrule, the place where that Elf-looking guy Link came from. I still feel kinda sad watching him die in the toilet movie so I can only imagine what kind of trouble his world is in without its hero!
At least in my world there’ll be plenty of Pokemon Trainers to hold back any bad guys that try and mess things up. But then again, I think about all this crazy stuff I’ve seen and the members of the N team as we’ve come together to fight against the masters. We definitely have come a long way and I don’t think other worlds have a good chance without us and the captain!
Well anyways, he we are in Hyrule and the first thing I noticed was all the tall grass everywhere! I think I’ve learned by now that I’m not going to find any Pokemon no matter how much the creatures around here look like them! I mean seriously, an octopus that walks on land and spits rocks? Plus it’s called and Octo-rock? I mean that just screams Pokemon! Oh well, I’ll just have to keep my eyes open!
We found ourselves outside of this cottage in the pouring rain. It looked kinda run down and out of sorts but we went inside to find some old guy asleep. It was really weird because no matter what we did to wake him, nothing worked! Chrono went so far as to drench the guy in water and Ernest poked him for what seemed like 5 minutes. Talk about lazy, even I’m not that tough to wake up in the morning! On top of that, his place must’ve been untouched for what seemed like months, I mean cobwebs EVERYWHERE and just stinky moldy smell on everything. Definitely not as refreshing as tall grass.
Well we sadly couldn’t help the guy so we decided to follow a few paths around. We came to the edge of this weird overgrown forest that was all wrapped up in briars and thorns. Scorched into the ground was a symbol like some kind of triangle but nothing happened when we investigated. We doubled back and came to what looked like a town at the base of a magnificent castle! It was ALMOST as grand as the palace of power (but not as grand). Still the more I think about it, if the palace is still in ruins under the shield, then I guess this castle will have to be grandest of all… the only trouble was, WE COULDN’T GO INSIDE!!!
That’s right, there was some kind of force field surrounding it! It seems giant force fields are a must if you have a castle! Somebody better tell princess peach and Mario that! Maybe it’ll keep them safe from that Bowser guy more often. Still, if somebody kept trying to kidnap my girlfriend, I wouldn’t invite them to play tennis, or golf, or Kart racing or anything like that… where was I? Oh, sorry about that, we tried for a couple of minutes to work our way through the barrier, but we had no luck at all. On top of that, all the people in the town looked like they had fallen asleep right where they stood!
We all worked together to pick the people up and put them into beds, that way when they woke they’d be ok. Ya know, thinking back on it, it’s going to be real funny if they wake up in a house that isn’t theirs…
Well while we were busy straightening out the town, we noticed a funny light coming from the well in the center of town. Tom didn’t waste any time buzzing right in and so we followed. It would’ve been kinda bad if it was a trap, but it was too late so we just jumped right on in. Wow if we followed shiny objects that easily, I think we’d be a heck of a lot easier to trap!
Well deep down in the well we found a bunch of fairies! Yep, just like Tom, but not Cyber, so I guess they weren’t really all that much like him. Their leader was this creepy pale little girl with a doll. She told us that if we wanted to get into the palace, we each had to be worthy to enter the sacred chambers at the same time and retrieve the amulets of Courage, Power, and Wisdom. Ya know I’m just a kid and I think it’d just be a heck of a lot easier hiding the key under the doormat. But what do I know, I’m just ten :P
So off we were, we kinda argued awhile over who was going on who’s team but a few rounds of eenie meenie miney moe sorted that out pretty fast. Well not really. We each had to have some communication or something to talk to everybody else. There was my PokeDex, Charlie’’s Phone, and Samus’s well entire suit of gizmos.
Luckily as it turned out, some mystical force had picked it out for us! If I had the time, I’d name it something cool like Brent or something but we didn’t have time to talk it over. We went to the triangle mark in from of the forest and me and Ernest were picked first! That’s great because I’m not usually picked first for stuff like baseball or kickball. We went deep into the forest and found this giant tree like fortress. It was really scary but Ernest knew a lot about plants so I think we’d be safe. Plus I was planning on using Charmeleon against any grass types we came across. We were ready!
When we entered there were two doors. Luckily it wasn’t a complicated choice (more eenie meenie miney moe for the win). We both agreed on left and found ourselves in a huge unlit room. There was this huge key, just hanging there on a chain in the middle of the room. I figured under the doormat would have made more sense again, but I don’t make dungeons, I just delve them >.<
As soon as we grabbed the key, the doors slammed shut on us and hundreds of these tiny red dots lit up the darkness. Charmeleon lit the room up and we saw dozens of these weird nut men (again not Pokemon)! They were kinda cute until they started flinging their nuts at us! It started to get annoying, then it started to hurt! Even Charmeleon got some nuts caught in his throat. The back blast almost fried me and Ernest! Luckily Ernest started playing Whack-A-Mole with his giant hammer and it was like Deku-Bowling from then on! Charlie had told me later that they were called Deku Scrubs, but I‘d just call them annoying!
Charmeleon got his breath back and managed a Flamethrower shot that sent them running! The doors opened and we were able to double back. When we got to the room back though we were surrounded by a pack of these ravenous looking wolves! It was terrifying for a long time but then Ernest pulled out his squeaky toy for his dog and started giving them orders. I followed suit talking to the wolves like I would my PokeMon, ya know firmly when you’re trying to teach them something and they won’t listen.
It was scary for a awhile but we got them to calm down and even to like us! They were really cute after that! There wasn’t much else to do but open the last door. The huge key took a lot of strength to turn but we got the massive door opened and we stirred up all our Courage to go inside. It was dark for a awhile but eventually we came to this huge chamber where we saw Link!
Well, it looked like link but it wasn’t him, it was all shadowy and evil looking! He was really mean looking and he had this green amulet around his neck! Ernest and I didn’t hold back, we attacked with all we had! We worked together to try and overpower Link by combining our attacks. Squirtle turned into a rocket shell and Ernest was propelled at Link like well, a rocket. It was intense and we definitely had some power going. It just wasn’t enough though.
Everything on Link was made out of shadow so we couldn’t grab, trip, or grapple anything! We kept on trying though and it was starting to look desperate! When things looked their bleakest, we didn’t lose hope though! We heard a howl on the wind and all of our wolves burst into the room! They tackled and pounced on Shadow Link and gave him a beating! On top of that, the Deku-Scrubs rushed in and assaulted Link with a hundred-gun-nut-barrage! He was definitely on the ropes! Ernest and I got lucky though, we tore the amulet off of Link and he vanished in a puff of smoke! Just then, everything went white! I don’t think it was bad because I didn’t lose any money and I didn’t wake up at the nearest PokeMon Center.
Well after everything came to, we were all standing together as a team in the well room again with the Hacker and the Freak looking pleased with themselves! It looks like Charlie got a blue amulet and Chrono and Samus had found a red amulet. It looks like Chrono and Samus had to fight really hard for theirs because Chrono looked really hurt! There was no time for rest, though, we had an epic fight on our hands! The Freak wanted to get revenge on us so she sent the Hacker away and tried to use Evil Tom on us! Poor Tom looked so scared!
Luckily in the flash of an instant, the Freak somehow lost the bottle that had Evil Tom inside and the captain had it in his hands! It was then that I noticed the captain had some kind of retro and ancient looking belt buckle controller thing! It must’ve been really powerful because the Freak didn’t look happy at all! The captain tried talking to the Evil Tom to try and use him like the Freak did but it started making Good Tom go ballistic! Well, there was no saving it, the captain whipped out his blaster and Ka-Pow, fried Evil Tom into evil space dust!
We fought as hard as we could, using team attacks and everything! It looked Chrono and Samus had been training hard too because they were super charging with power too! We all tried to pig pile and wrestle with the freak as Ernest went so far as to try and chop off the Freak’s leg with gardening shears! Remind me not to get him mad, like ever! Samus and Chrono were trying to juggle with her as well, but she cheated and turned off Samus’s armor. That didn’t stop Samus one bit though! She tore into the Freak like a Snorlax on a ham sandwich!
We thought the Freak would be out of commission, but she was just getting warmed up! She…she… she… took my Magikarp, Ackbar, and … made him turn into a giant evil Garrados! It was amazing and terrifying to see Ackbar like that! He was charging up his Dragon Rage to overwhelm us and I tried my very best to wake up Ackbar and make him recognize me! I tried to look into his heart and remind him that he was my friend and that I cared about him. It was really sad, but I just couldn’t reach him… v_v It was in that moment that I realized that I still had a long way to go to become a good trainer. Whether with or without badges, I have to listen to my PokeMon better and try to understand their hearts… Looks like I need to train myself before I can train them…
Luckily Good Tom (well I guess, just Tom) got supercharged and helped us. Before we became Dragon Rage bait (which would have made my previous revelation a few seconds too late), Tom launched himself down Ackbar’s throat! I thought he was totally Sea Monster kibble but Ackbar snapped back and well De-Evolved! Never, I mean never ever, have I heard that happen before! I’m pretty sure every trainer in existence has never ever heard that before!
I was so scared for Magikarp, but it turns out he was ok! Tom was back and more ready and willing to battle than anyone! It was really heart-warming to see how motivated he was and how he thought we were all a team! He did some kind of strange scan on us and he transformed! It was like HE evolved into something like Mecha-Poke-Samurai-Captain-Hunter-Farmer Tom! Oh wait, I got a better one! Mega-Ultra-Crazy-Hyper-Overpowered Tom – HA HA MUCHO TOM~!
It was at that moment we had to press our attack against the Freak! There was no holding back because it was All out payback on the Freak! It was like the Captain guided our hand in that single moment in time because we all came together as a true team and unleashed a power that I think will make the Masters think twice before tangling with us again! It was amazing! Pokemon powers blazing, charged blasts firing, Chrono launching lightning explosions and Ernest rushing forward handing out hammer time! It was beyond epic!
After we defeated the freak, we returned the amulets to the Fairy Queen (who thankfully healed us all). And set off to the castle to meet the princess, who thankfully wasn’t in another castle. Well I found out later that the captain actually had the power of the Tri-Force which gave him three wishes! It was really cool to see that he chose to bring back Hyrule to the way it was. I mean all the way back, Link alive and Gannon and everything! It was really neat seeing Hyrule the way it was supposed to be.
It’s kinda weird to think about what it would be like to have three wishes, I mean the captain could’ve turned his back on everything and just gone home or he could have wished something else. I guess that’s why he’s the captain and he had the amulet of Wisdom. Deep down, I think he made the best choice of all. I admit, that if I was in his place, I’d probably wish to go home to see my mom or something. I guess that means I still have some growing up to do! I think I’m going to try and be like the captain and think of the right choices before rushing in. As long as I have my friends, my Pokemon AND my team mates, I think it’ll turn out ok!
Well we found the computer and location of the next world is called Tetris World. Samus seems to have some bad feeling about the place so I think we’re going to have to be careful! She said something about losing the princess’s brother there. It definitely sounds dangerous, but if Ernest can fling around those Tetris blocks like he did the captain’s, than I feel a little bit safer. If worse comes to worse, we can have mashed potatoes!
We’re off, as my Pokemon journey takes yet another strange turn, let’s see what’s around the next bend…or block…or whatever…

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Following the Events in Hyrule...
in the Real World

“Raaagh!”

The Freak knocked over a cart of archaic looking computer equipment angrily. It didn’t make her feel any better. All of the hard work training with The Hacker, and The N Team still schooled her like it was her first day inside. An old keyboard clattered across the floor and stopped at the sneakered foot of Gary Grant, The Jock.

“Frustrating, isn’t it?”

The Freak glowered at him. “At least you had a chance. They destroyed Virus 001”

“Technically they corrupted it for their own use. Its only a beta anyway. It makes no change to The Programmer’s plans.”

The Freak grinned darkly and lit up a clove cigarette. “Listen to you, you sound like The Nerd. But you didn’t fare much better in your last battle with them.”

The Jock matched her grim expression. “The Captain has grown faster than anticipated. Which is why it’s actually advantageous you’ve returned. The Hacker can handle them at Tetris. The Programmer is sure of it.”

“And what is so… ‘advantageous’ in my return?” She took a long drag, holding the smoke in her lungs for a moment, then exhaling slowly.

The Jock’s grin faded a little. “We are to exploit the Captain’s weaknesses. In Video Land he is unstoppable. But out here, his flaws are right out in the open for us to prey on. And the Programmer has a task for us along that vein.”

“Don’t be coy with me, Grant. Just cut to the chase.”

“Believe me, you probably don’t want to know, but we will need your help when its time.”

Gary turned to leave. She twisted her mouth to say something but let to words fade into the acrid smoke. She snuffed the ember on the side of a computer monitor and turned the other way. She would have to clean the mess she made before The Programmer returned, if he was going to return today. She could hear The Jock open the double doors at the end of the hall and his descent down the stairs, two at a time.

She spoke into the room, to the hollow green monitors staring coldly back at her. “Best watch your step, Captain N. The Masters aren’t ‘all talk’, as you say. And you’ve stepped on his toes one too many times.”

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What did the Archer say to the Fighter?
Duck

(Chrono pulls out a small book and begins to write in Japanese.)

Journal Entry: Chrono
Date: Pre-Tetris

We found our way to Hyrule, the portal the Captain made worked perfectly. It reminded me of the Future. Rain. A depressing almost soul crushing atmosphere. The first person we came across was sleeping. An unnatural sleep that couldn’t be broken. I want to be the same happy person I was before in Megaman’s world, but I find it hard in this weather—it’s too bleak. My mind is troubled, while I want to enjoy my time with my friends, I know that we are moving inexorably toward our fated destination. Every day that goes by is another day that I must become stronger, become better so that we can have a chance at saving her. At changing what will come to pass. In the meantime, I am finding that these people, the hero’s whose shadows I have been chasing for a while are acting…childish in someways. I am finding, as is often the way, that they are more mortal then I had seen them as in my time.

We made our way to Hyrule Castle, a large shield guarded the way. Solid. I couldn’t help but recall the area in the forest guarded by a similar magic. Now, however, I don’t have Marle’s necklace to dispel the effect. Some triangle symbol is present as well—a key no doubt. Having to turn around we make our way to the forest. Instead of a shield an overgrowth of vines impedes our path. sigh Is nothing simple in this accursed place? We made our way once more to the small village where we met our sleeping friend. At the bottom of a well all was explained.

An enchantment had fallen upon these people, a wish gone awry from the princess. To correct it we needed to find three aspects of power here. Courage, Wisdom and Power. Of course, all three aspects needed to be grabbed at the same time. I seemed to have made the Queen of Fairies angry when Samus and I were debating the benefits of how the teams should be divided up. As it turns out The Captain laid down the law, and as such we had little choice. Another turn in the road though, as it seems that the “Temples” would only allow certain people in. The Captain’s teams stood the challenge. One almost has to wonder if he has some hidden insight into these things—other then his knowledge of all of video land. We were all a bit worried about how to remain in communication with one another. I provided the answer, though I must admit it was not my idea. It was actually The N Team who provided the answer to me in thier telling of another adventure.

Earnest and Red were on one team, sent into the Forest to gather their trophy. Samus and I were on another, which lead Tom The Cyber Elf and The Captain to go to the Castle. I must admit I was apprehensive of having the two best and only true Warriors on one team. the Captain I know is ranked with us, but I am here to protect him as much as I am to prevent the death. I don’t know what happened with the others in their trials, as I am sure my presence here has altered much in the flow of time.

When Samus and I entered the temple we were presented with two choices, left or right. Proceeding right we found ourselves in front of a suit of armor with an Axe. We both looked at one another and knew that as we approached it would come to be a member of the undead. True to form, it was. Every one of my attacks was shrugged off as though I were almost not there. Even the mighty Luminare and Lightning spells did nothing. Another stark reminder that I am not in my world anymore. After taking several blows that would have killed lesser warriors it was Samus that destroyed it’s armor with an artful display of her prowess in battle. We both performed our Dual Tech “Thunder and Lightning.” I rode a full charge from her blaster leaping onto the beast attacking it with savage furry, and positioned it into the plasma fire of her gun. Nothing was left. I was glad to be able to do that once more. The next room proved a challenge to the both of us, a large pit of lava over which was suspended a key. With no clear way across it was up to Samus and her acrobatic experience to retrieve it. More then once I wish that I could have done something, but I am trained to fight for Guardia, to save people, not to do stunts. Somehow though she has been trained for both. The chain she had swung on gave way and of course woke something up. A giant Fire Dinosaur. My time with Ayla lead me to know exactly how to defeat such creatures. With the memory of the Tyrano Lair fresh in my mind I let loose with my lightning spells. To no avail. Once more it seems that there is nothing fair in this world. Samus displayed remarkable knowledge of the creature. I needed to distract the creature while she fired one of her missiles into it’s mouth. Her aim was true, but the heat from it’s breath attack forced the projectile off course. There was now only one solution, she would need to be swallowed as a ball and detonate inside it. After missing with my first attempt, I was able to kick her inside with my second. Once there we were able to defeat the creature, though I believe she did most of the work.

With in the final chamber there was some monstrous pig demon whose tail was it’s only weak spot. Around it’s neck was the red pendant we required. Alas, each time we felled the thing it simply returned to standing. Four or five times we weakened it. Every time it decided that I was to be it’s prey. A choice I was fine with. On the last swipe Samus had had enough and simpy liberated the pendant from it. No sooner had we defeated the monster then we were back in the Queen Fairy’s room retrieving the “Game Pad” for the Captain. Shortly there after two of the Master’s had shown up.

One of them quickly ran off, flicking a tetris block at the Captain. My blood ran cold when I saw it. A dare for him to follow to that forsaken realm. First we had to dispatch with The Freak. I saw Ackbar become the one I know. Though twisted and now evil, it took Tom to return it to the one Red had before. It was Tom once again who allowed us to dispatch The Freak. They simply disappeared, upon asking The Captain what happened he told me they went to some World called “Reality”, I recommended that we give chase. It seems that I am unable to get there as I am not real. I don’t understand, I am real. I have had an entire life, some of which was shaped by the N Team itself, most of which has simply been to save the world I love. It was Captain Keene that showed me the other worlds that exist outside of my own reality and allowed me to fall in love with a world other then my own.

I know I should have been more understanding to Red, I shouldn’t have chided him when he was talking about Tetris. However the knowledge of what happens there will haunt me until I correct it. Once all of us are safe and outside of that forsaken realm I will be myself again. I hope.

Thinking about it though: what kind of world does Red come from? I mean he is about 10 years of age, almost an adult, but still a child. Yet he is entrusted with an odd grass wielding flower, a powerful turtle, a flaming salamander, and a fish that turns into a giant dragon. From what I can tell as well this is common place for his world. Who gives children such ultimate power?

sigh

Samus didn’t need me for the temple. Anytime in there that I thought I could have been an assistance she simply proved to me how she is capable and able to be on her own. While every time I had the chance to prove that I am not the same young boy she hasn’t met yet, I proved that I am still just as inept as I was before. Has nothing changed? Am I still as brash and new to this as I was when I took the first step into the teleporter to follow Marle? Must I go through the same trials and tribulations again? Must I be as ineffective as I was at the beginning of my own story? When the time comes will I even be able to help? Or when the times comes will I need to die again, as I did to save Marle and Lucca? If I must: I go willingly. Samus, Red, Earnest, Keene…my friends are worth my life. All of video land is worth my life. Saving her is more important than my existence.

The way of the warrior is to one day hope that you never need to pick up your sword.

I will not let them fail this time.

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www.nevergetoveryou.net
Personal Blog of Terance Eriksson

Date: Friday
Mood: (=D) Happy
Listening to: Def Leppard-Pour Some Sugar On Me
Doing: Studying for Eng

Walking with Sick-Boy (Sick Boy, Sickboy?) today. Ran into a crowd of people. One of them was one of the few students who is going to be passing English this semester. We talked about the Freudian Analysis of characters in stories. Still didn’t follow. Wish class was more like Calc or Physics—at least I would be able to understand it. This whole touchy feely crap is a little out of hand. Still, need to pass the class or I will be failing out this semester. Can’t loose the scholarship now. Would set a bad example for Brian and James. Sarah I am sure will be fine, always has been.

With Al was also two women. Sick-Boy didn’t want to stay to chat with one, might have to look into that. Another was an Asian—can’t remember their names. I don’t think they told me. Sick-boy just called the white one “her”. Others didn’t introduce themselves. Al was at least polite.

Al looked like a Pedo. Short shorts and all. Went back to his place to discuss this English problem more. Revealed that he has the “yellow-fever.” Lent me a copy of his Eng book, will come in handy later—easier to study from then the actual texts. More condensed. Can accept information simply to pass class. Wont fail out now. Offered to help him “get lucky” with his Asian Princess. Went shopping, revelation of enjoyment of Pokemon franchise. Bought outfit accordingly. Chucks, Cargo-pants, “Keep Karpin’” shirt, Poke-Ball Bandoleer Sweatshirt. Unsure if it is much of an improvement as his personality isn’t a match for the outfit. Still better then the 42 suits he has. Should get him noticed at least. Will need to talk to the tomboy to judge affections the other way. Think the oriental doesn’t like me…might have been on the rag.

At home now. Mom still working. have a few hours for peace and quiet as the kids are still out as well. It’s a Friday so Brian and James are still out at the movies. Wont be back until late no doubt. Sarah is probably at her boyfriend’s house for the night. Still not sure how I feel about him. Met him once. Still think he’s a tool hat. Anyway. I am done reading this text book for now. Maybe I can get past Magus’ damn castle in Chrono Trigger… Time to boot up the Emulator.

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Time Warp Wackiness in Mega-Land!

PokeDex Log Entry 6
Trainer: Red

Wow, my eyes were still spinning around in my head from that crazy flashback! I just fished out Akbar (My Magikarp) from that magic well thingie the goddess had us stare at and no sooner than that, she’s ready to send us off to our next place. I was hoping to see if I could check the well and see if it gets e-mails at least. I miss Mom and professor Oak and well all the Pokemon stuff I had back home.

I don’t know, it seems kinda weird, like the whole universe is so much bigger than our own little worlds. Imagine that nobody back home has seen ANY of this, not even “My Asshole”, my PokeMon rival! Anyways while I was still trying to make sense of the flashback scene, we were told we were going to this place called Mega-Land. It sounds like it belongs to that blue guy, Mega-Man. If so, than I’m in for more outlandish stuff that I won’t understand. Hey, maybe I can find a computer out there and grab some E-mailed potions or something! Nah, knowing my luck, they probably all drink batteries there or something. Oh well, here goes…

Ok, so we’ve been in this world for maybe 10-minutes and I’m already confused! Everything, I mean E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G is made of metal! There’s NO tall grass to speak of! I don’t know weather to be sad or relieved to be able to walk two squares without stepping on something! If you think I’ve got it bad, you should see Ernest! I think he needs a paralyz heal because he’s not taking it well. Speaking of stepping on things, we found this weird little thing in the corner, I need to check it out while everybody’s hogging the computer, I don’t know what’s so important it just looks like some old guy talking about time travel.

Oh, WOW! The thing in the corner is some kind of creature called a Cyber Elf! I told him all about PokeMon and he says HE IS one! He’s even barfing water beams all over everything and doing Pokemon moves, this is so cool! I’m gonna call him TOM! TOM the CYBER FAIRY! Huh, they’re talking about time travel, maybe I should’ve been paying attention to …

Ouch my ears are ringing, we just went back in time and found another Tom! They did some weird fusion and now Tom seems to be feeling better. He must be really sick because everyone’s calling him a Virus or something wacky like that. We ended up in the same room as before, only it looks like more stuff works in it and there’s less dust everywhere. We also got jumped but a bunch of robot soldier guys who were freaking out and yelling at us! The captain scored some cool laser spear thing and we all had to time travel some more. I don’t like this, every time we time travel forward… we’re going back in the past… I wonder if we’ll ever have to go … Back to the Future??!!

Ow, I think my organs got turned into soup on that one! We’re not in the room anymore and we gotta find it so we can find more Toms to fix him up! Luckily, he’s not just a Pokemon, he’s a map too, I think. Oh yea, Samus downloaded the internet! The whole thing! Now we shouldn’t have any problems getting around.

We’re totally lost. All of this metal stuff is messing with my brain! Everything has eyes and talks. If they were PokeMon, it would make sense because, well, they’re pokemon! They’re not talking trash-cans, mailboxes and trees! We need to find a guys lab. His name is Doctor Cain I think and he found this robot named Mega-Man X too. I bet he’s a lot like Mega-Man and I guess “X” times cooler too! According to Samus’s internet, we need to find this place called Hunter HQ and find Doctor Cain.

We had to kinda sneak into the Maverick Hunter HQ in order to get some information. I felt really bad that I had to lie to get us in there but I guess nobody minded a little fib. I bet Ernest would’ve washed my mouth out with soap if it really was bad. Well anyway we met up with this big bald guy named Sigma, who seemed to be the leader of the Maverick hunters. I guess a “Maverick” is a robot that goes completely wacky bananas and wants to smash everything. I guess that’s not too bad if you want a robot that breaks stuff but I guess I can see how it might get to be a pain if too many do it. Well Sigma told us where Doctor Cain is as well as his lab, we gotta go check it out!

I think time travel did something to my brain. We just met up with this Mega Man X and I…I… don’t know what to make of him. I mean when I was in the flashback and seeing stuff through Mega Man, I felt the need to help and I guess the desire to succeed. This X guy doesn’t even want to fight. I guess is like a giant cross out, like Mega-Man NOPE! He’s still willing to help us get a chopper to see the lab but he says the radiation is beyond dangerous for us. I don’t think I have any radiation heal or anything like that…

Ok, now time travel is DEFINITELY messing with my head! A huge purple wormhole just tore open in front of us and some crazy looking guy with red hair came flying out! I mean REALLY red hair! He said his name is Chrono and that he’s met us before! Now I know that’s not true, I mean, we’re not the kind of “N” Team that you can easily mistaken, I mean we are all really awesome! I also think that I’d remember a guy who looks like a samurai radish ninja-guy.
Well he says he knows us from the FUTURE and he said all kinds of weird stuff about us. He says I grow up to be a lot stronger so I guess that’s not bad! He says he’s gotta follow us and help us out. Frankly I think that’s the only turn of luck we’ve had so far, seeing how Falco had to leave to fight back in his Space War back home.

We headed to lab and found another Tom! This one’s a little crazy though and we had to put it inside Ernest’s bag. It was kinda scary for awhile cause there was this countdown like it was going to explode and everyone was freaking out! I think we need to go into the far flung future now to a time when there was a Cyber Elf war! I can’t imagine a war with cyber elves though, I mean Tome is so cool and well kinda tiny. I guess they get more dangerous the more experience they get, kinda like Pokemon!
At least that’s what those Master jerks must’ve thought. They popped in and Elf-Napped Tom! It was the Jock, again! He said that he was going to activate Tom and that the virus was going to spread or something like that. I didn’t even know Tom was sick!

We warped into some strange lab place where they’re doing all kinds of bad stuff to Cyber-Elves! We freed a grumpy fellow I named Ezekiel Lightning Bolt (cool name, huh?) and a helpful (sort of) Nurse Fairy by the name of Captain Admiral Flash! They’re gonna help us get Tom back!
We rushed up to the top floor to find the Jock holding Tom captive in a cage. There was also an evil Mega-Man X clone and that red armor robot name Zero (the one from the flash back). They were fighting each other while Jock was making all these commands to Tom, the poor guy!
Ezekiel Lightning Bolt and Captain Admiral Flash helped us turn the tide to help defeat the evil robot X and set the Jock on the ropes. Of course, the Jock didn’t play fair. He clipped us and sent us spiraling through the floors and stuff. It felt much weirder than time travel! I felt like a Ghost type for sure! Anyways, we had to get Tom back from the Jock, and the Captain had a great idea! He gave me this weird arm device and a Poke Ball. It turned the regular Poke Ball into a Shadow Ball, capable of capturing another trainer’s pokemon! It was on!
I was able to capture Tom back! I was so glad to get my little buddy back, but he’s a little out of it. He’s still stuck in the cage. I was so worried about him that I wasn’t listening when the others were messing with another computer. I thought we learned time travel was BAD!!
Well, this time they did some weird computer stuff to Tom and warped us into the past again!
We were at some weird college campus. Well it was better at least because all the grass was normal and the trees were made of wood! Ernest sure was happy, as we all were! I only wish the secretary lady was as nice. Her name was Mrs. Frumplebottom or something wacky like that and she just waved us off to the dean to try and find Dr Light. That’s was such a wacky name I need to remember it for a Pokemon I catch, like a Wabbofet or something.
Luckily the dean was a little bit nicer in helping us find Doctor Light. We had to lie a little bit more but I think it all worked out ok. I was really looking forward to seeing the great genius guy who made Mega Man! It’s kinda weird to know he’s the same old guy who made Mega Man X too.
Well, we met up with old (well he was young) Dr. Light (he wasn’t a doctor yet either). Everything looked a little bit more normal accept the weird computer and what the captain called a classic Game Boy. It seems like Samus liked the Game Boy because she got all concerned after playing with it. After a little while of messing up Light’s college room, his nasty room mate Dr. Wily came in (he wasn’t a doctor either, thankfully). Charlie gave him the tape, just like he promised the Pirate and Tom came back to himself as we left.
Samus told us that Game Boy was the computer to shut down the shield generator and that the next place we had to go was the land of Hyrule! I don’t know WHAT game she was playing on that thing but I don’t know how she got over all the puke green colors, yuck! Now I definitely know that time travel is bad for your health!
Oh yea, come to find out, the Captain has the special power to make portals! That’s come in real handy since we lost all of our space ships and cool rides! We’re off to Hyrule and well hopefully we can fill up our hearts with courage and … well let’s see… _

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Do Robots Dream of Electric Sheep

[System Boot]
Run system.sys
log sensory data to bootlog.txt/Mission Record Log 100459
print file 100459.txt

“Mission Record Log 100459
Status: Zero Hour, Final preparations for Mother Brain’s Invasion Force
Analysis: “N” team’s fighting capabilities have been reduced significantly by absence of leader, Kevin Keene
Synopsis:
Security upgrades are in place. Thanks to doctor Light’s investment and invention. Slow opening security doors, gun emplacements and MET’s have been placed along every access route. My interface capabilities are still not 100% in syncro with the Palace of Power, there are some “Black Box” systems I cannot gain access to and Game Boy seems to be in charge of them. I’m not sure what hoping is, but this seems like a likely scenario where one would “hope” that all defenses will suffice.
Princess Lana has chosen to lead the remnants of the N team on a final assault upon Mother Brain’s planet, Metroid. According to information moving around the palace, she has just gone through the human procedure of reproduction and does not seem at maximum efficiency for fighting. The deviation in performance is going to have to be left up to the other offensive elements of the team.
Simon Belmont’s methods of combat seem a bit archaic, such as a use of a whip might be against laser batteries, but his confidence and reassuring nature seems to be a morale boost to the bio-forms of our team.
Pit, the champion of Mount Olympus has the combat capability of flight and high maneuverability and he is extremely efficient with his bow and arrow. He seems to have gotten over his speech impediment of adding “-icus” to the end of every sentence. This robot would think that if it were a machine, it would have been a flaw of programming.
On that same point of analysis, another member of our Cadre operating with obsolete weaponry is the Hylian hero known as Link. His sword and shield and random assortment of post iron-age equipment seems to be of little use compared to our armament. However, secondary energy scans read that all members of the N team not wielding technological weaponry are possessed as of yet an unknown energy source. I will catalogue this energy source as [sub file MAGIC.txt] and analyze later, time permitting
Samus Aran seems to have the right course action and has upgraded and tuned her suit to maximum capabilities. Weighing odds of success increase dramatically with such firepower available.
Secondary analysis of Princess Lana yields information on her armament. She seems to be wielding the Blaster and Power Glove. The gravity of the situation is completely understandable, even for myself.
The final assault begins as we enter the core of the floating planet, Metroid. Security systems have been activated, as was assumed in previous battle schematics. The front line parameter is guarded by Mother Brain’s generals, Eggplant Wizard and King Hippo. Data files are up to date and threat level is considered minimum. A full frontal assault dispatches them with minimum effort as I have contributed a 13% input to part damage by utilizing [power_slide.exe] and [mega_buster.exe] on the reproductive organs of King Hippo.
Moving into the next sector, we have found ourselves in a large vaulted cylindrical chamber. It seems my old nemesis, Dr Wily, is waiting in a new assault robot suit. I cannot scan the systems, as they are shielded. A full on assault must be pushed. After activation of a threat level “S” laser assault, Wily has attempted summoning a strange robot/bio-form he refers to as Zero. All scans are off the chart in the way of technology and capability but it seems we are capable of dealing with him. Wily, in a last ditch effort to stop us, has attempted a self-destruct mechanism, wrapping a high powered explosive around the princess. Probability for survival seems low, but success was attained through team work, a tried and true equation.
After dispatching with the doppelganger robotic Wily, the only way to press forward seems to climb the chamber upwards. At the summit of this conduit, an opened chamber awaits. A darkness envelops the room that even infrared and x-ray scanners cannot penetrate [ *update MAGIC.txt]
Another being attempts to hinder our path forward. Vital scans indicate no life signs present in assumed organism. Introduced as Dracula, he seems to be a foe from Simon’s world.

All attempts to attack the darkness have failed. There is an elf in front of me… it is Link.

[Reroute system lag/ memory stack dump #FFFFFFF clear partition]
[Resume analysis]
Prolonged power output from all members has forced the use of the Power Glove’s inane ability to open portals. Princess Lana has opened a portal to the Sun. Though this action seems extreme in nature, it is effective 1000%. Dracula has been dispatched and satisfactorily cremated to component atoms. The risk factor made by Samus in forcing Dracula through the portal must be taken note of as this human capability for self-sacrifice seems to be contradictory to human nature of self-preservation.
Approaching the chamber of Mother Brain, we meet another powerful target. Known as Medusa, the team is subjected to more battery as Medusa’s paralyzing stone beam is taking its toll on our group [ *update MAGIC.txt]. Team combat effectiveness is down 20% with the dispatching of Link…
[Program Lag]
[Uknown Subroutine/ emotion.dll/
Execute $4DN3$$ ]
A strange reaction to this event is running through my subroutines. Reaction to outside stimulus is generating a feedback. It is like the circuits around my power core are registering a pain.
[Query: Is this the emotion of human sadness? Analysis to follow post-combat]
[Resume analysis]
. The final confrontation with Mother Brain is a bit fuzzy on the receptors. All power re-routed to body servos for maximum efficiency. The outer casing of the fortress is being torn away. Mother Brain has revealed itself to be a massive bio-form linked to Metroid itself. We have come under the direct fire of our own laser batteries as fighters scramble and we approach the Palace of Power. A forceful assault involves scaling the creature and dispatching with the bio-mass of brain tissue at the apex of Mother Brain. Again team work seems to pull through in the end.
The final portal held within the Power Glove will take us back to the palace where we can take up defensive positions.
[Warning proximity sensors indicate a massive metal/bio-form {Ridley}]
We are forced through the portal leaving Samus behind…
[Evaluate Combat Effectiveness] -25%
[Program Lag]
[Uknown Subroutine/ emotion.dll/
Execute F34R.run ]
A strange reaction to this event is running through my subroutines. Reaction to outside stimulus is generating a feedback. It is like the circuits around my leg servos are partially unresponsive they are quaking sporadically.
[Query: Is this the emotion of human Fear? Analysis to follow post-combat]
[Resume analysis]
The Palace of Power is under full siege. Massive bio-form detected.
[Proximity sensors indicate bio-form {Kraid}]
[Re-route all power to main cannon. Charge all reserves to full.]
[Run Last_Ditch_Effort.exe]
After unleashing all the power left in the effective N Team, the siege is held momentarily at bay. Game boy has executed some form or previously unknown programming. The palace is surrounded in a shield and all is in a strange for of stasis.
All sound of battle ceases. We are alone. We are given final instructions by the Princess to enter the lower chambers of the palace and await the return of the captain. The Princess does not seem to be following. I am detecting a reactive rise in blood pressure from Simon. We must follow orders.
I am beginning to feel the strange subroutines again. I must do a full systems analysis while in stasis. Perhaps I have been damaged somehow and overhaul is needed. It is a complex conclusion of the fact. I conclude I feel fear… fear, sadness and…

[Run subroutine {Hope.exe /d /format}]

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Note to Future Self
The same thing all over again...

(Chrono pulls out a small book and begins to write in Japanese.)

Journal Entry: Chrono
Date: Still a little unsure…

Truth be told, I am unsure of exactly how much I can say in this…I mean we aren’t just time hopping anymore. Even the Captain warned me that the rules for time travel are different with each world we visit. This is also the first time I have gone to a time within my own life.

Sigh.

We missed. I overshot the time we were aiming for. Like normal. I was supposed to show up shortly before they arrived in Te That Place. Instead I arrived shortly after they arrived in…I think it was Megaman’s world…20XX. It was great to see them again too, before they became the people I know, the friends that I depend on. I knew going in this would be a one-way trip, but at the same time the ability to see them grow into my friends again—to share in the adventures they have told me about so many times around the proverbial campfire.

Yet, here i am surrounded by my friends and I am completely alone. I realize that this is the first time that I have traveled by myself. Even when Marle went missing Lucca came with, I haven’t been alone since then, always with the people that would help me through the toughest times. Even when I joined up with the Captain and the N-Team, someone has always been there with me to keep my head level and my sanity in some cases. Now I am with the shadows of my friends. Here I have the memories of their adventures, and stories that they haven’t been on yet. I look at them and I have the utmost faith and trust in them—how many times have they saved my life, how many times have I saved theirs? Yet they look at me and I see not friendship in their eyes, but distrust, and confusion.

Samus, her ever stoic self still hiding herself behind the faceplate of her Powersuit. I remember how long it had taken for her to actually trust me, not just believe I can take care of myself. Though, that was a long time ago, by my standards. I have become a more competent fighter since we first met. Maybe things will be different this time around?

Ernest, he wears his heart on his sleeve still. I thank the heavens he hasn’t changed at all. We will need that in the times to come. His brash honesty is welcome—at least I know he trusts me.

Red, dear god. Where do I begin? I suppose the real question is when did he grow up? I don’t remember him being anything like the Red he is now. I know that he received Ackbar when he was younger…but certainly the mighty Ackbar I know isn’t this little piece of want to be sushi. I wish I could tell him about the man he will become.

Then there is the Captain. He’s the same at least, though more cautious then I remember. Maybe her death had something to do with it. It effected all of us…

I just hope this goes a little smoother then the last time…

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